Why taking joy is a pain in my ass!

Who knew that taking back joy would end in the sentence, "I don't think my ass has ever hurt this bad."

As I mentioned in my last blog post, "I'm taking my joy back," my 34th year of life will be filled with things that bring me joy. About two weeks ago, I got it into my mind that I wanted a bicycle. I have no idea why I wanted a bike, but the urge was there, so I decided to get one. So I did what most wives do when they want something. I, in my not so subtle way, let my husband know. Again and again and again.

Me: "Wow, look at that person on that bike. I wish I had one."
Me: "If I had a bike, I would totally ride around our neighborhood."
Me: "When I get my bike, on my birthday, I will be so happy."
Me: "In case you were thinking of buying my bike, don't just go get one, give me a gift card so I can pick it myself."

Ya'll, I don't know how this man deals with me. 😂

Well, my birthday comes and Hubby took me to the bike shop. I tested many bikes, went for test rides, and bought way too many accessories than needed for a beginner biker. In the end, I got my bike!

This is the part where I should have written, "...and her and her bike lived happily ever after." Yeah, not the way it is going.

When I thought about this great scheme to get a bike, I forgot one thing...I haven't actually ridden a bike in like 14 years! The old adage that you never forget how to ride a bike (I think that is the saying...lol) is true. I still know how to ride a bike. However, my body feels so awkward. I wobble. I feel unsteady. And most importantly, I hurt.

As you can tell, I am a hearty woman. My ass is quite large and juicy. However, imagine the uncomfortableness of sitting all of my glory on something no bigger than my hand. It hurts and my "saddle" is sore. Even sitting on my soft couch reminds me of the soreness. Hubby just laughs when I sit down and yell, "Oh, my ass!"

I am on day four with my new bike and so far, I have ridden only five miles. I can honestly say, though, that those have been the happiest five miles of my life. I smile while I am riding and enjoy the wind blowing against my face as I go down a hill.

I still have a long way to go to being more than a dangerous beginner on the roads, but I can say, I am looking forward to every mile along the way.

Here is an added bonus photo of the neon safety jacket that Ryan is making me wear while riding. Thanks, hun, for really letting people know I am a novice. Lol.